Monday, October 03, 2005

Disillusionment Strikes: The Broken Ballerina

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If you don't believe that I actually just sent the following letter to my ballet instructor, then you don't know me at all. I'll post her reply as soon as I hear back...

Dearest Kaysie,
My name is Michael Warren Rice and you might remember me from your M-W morning ballet class. I am the young dancer who performs the atrocious pliets and am responsible for the only Y sex chromosome in the class. I write to you in regards to my feeling of utter disillusionment that has steadily grown over the last few weeks. I feel as though I’ve started this all wrong; let me explain.

My formative years were spent watching all the great dance movies: Dirty Dancing, Footloose, The Company, Save the Last Dance, You Got Served. Hell, anything touched by the majestic hands of Baz Luhrman filled me with more excitement than these words can convey. Broadway was not my dream, it was my destiny. Finally I decided it was time to take that first step, or tandue if you will, towards fate and I enrolled in Beginning Ballet.

When we fall Kaysie, we fall hard. Over the past few weeks it’s become apparent that I am perhaps the worst ballerina to ever step foot into that studio. My pliets look like Frankenstein trying to sit down onto a bar stool, my tandue en cwas resembles someone kicking rocks and stubbing their toe. All that to say my glittery aspirations have been crushed as I’ve suddenly realized my own inadequacies. My dreams, which once soared so high, have come crashing down to earth. When we see ourselves as we truly are (damn those floor to ceiling mirrors!), we don’t fall softly down to ground; instead we tumble down hard into the mud. I know I’ll never quite shine the same.

Tearfully,
Michael W. Rice

9 comments:

Anonymous said...

YOu must post what she writes back. I can't believe you wrote that"!

Anonymous said...

what happened to the roof of your car?

Sean Raybuck said...

hahaha michael that is soo funny. you make me laugh.

MW Rice said...

Well someone, and names aren't important (David Rice!), thought it would be a good idea to take off the headliner!

And Sean, thanks man. I'll let ya know what she says. I'm very interested to see...

BEst,
Rice

Anonymous said...

Dear Michael,
I once had the opportunity to watch you perform a few leaps and jazz runs in your summer house. It's not always about technique my friend, but about passion and dreams. Just ask Jodie from Center Stage.
Your BFF,
Lindzie

MW Rice said...

Well Marisa and Lindzie, what can I say? You two are the definition of good friends! THanks for the support and I am so lucky to have you girls in my life. I'll practice and watch center stage and hopefully I can improve and make you proud!
M

Anonymous said...

There's nothing worse than a saggy headliner! (well, actually, there are worse things but...)

MW Rice said...

Well DB, first of all, it's not a story. Second of all, I don't give you tips on how to run your blog... Think about it. Also, you need to wake up from your nap. Love,
Michael

MW Rice said...

Well DB, first of all, it's not a story. Second of all, I don't give you tips on how to run your blog... Think about it. Also, you need to wake up from your nap. Love,
Michael